trauma will bruise these pages
forever
the ink of discontent
will never run out
and I think about
today
how I woke up with anxiety
how I took a shower
and my shoulder hurts
and my ribs won’t stop rearranging themselves
and the pain is always better
but it never goes away forever
so yes
I am preoccupied with yesterday
simply because
the healing is never complete
and I don’t ever know
when the devil will come back to feast
on the frayed rope
holding my heart in one piece
and how can you heal
ever
when the struggle is never
complete
when I still see those glowing eyes
watching my every move
from a closet that never stays closed
I can’t let my guard down
ever
I can’t move on
because it never stops
following me
like a shadow
I cannot sever
from my ankles
so it drags behind me
everywhere I go.