Category: Depression

Masters Of Limitations

Oh what dance partners you are,

a delicate work of pain.

Once pristine, now distressed,

an entanglement of wordless feelings.

Hollow howls corrupt the corridors of my lungs,

an anthem familiar to a few.

Slaves to the sun, slaves to the moon.

My nightmares riddled. My breathing shallow.

I feel like I’m drowning,

and my heart is the sea.

Depleting me to nothing but my pointe shoes.

malady

Waves caress my feet

as i look to the tragic sky

for not a ray of sunlight survived

broken up, the sun and sky

Brutal. Vengeful. Spiteful.

their wars moaned through storms

and their agoney in waves

Tormenting the sea slowly

she was altered for eternity

screams for help errumpted, but none came

a chaos caged in terror

she collected her tears

in lost treasures at the bottom

She fought hard

to purify the malady poisoning her soul

Desperate. Helpless. Hopeless.

one day the sun will rise again

and the sky will be bright and blue

one day she could be happy

December

i am learning to be kind to myself. it’s me against myself nobody else. that is what determines my soul’s wealth. falling apart, i was falling apart remember? but i picked myself up and put myself back together. my heart is like the weather of december. hard and solid as a rock. it’s got to be like that to protect the soft spots. my core is so soft. only a few can tell you that. cause there’s only a few that get close enough to see through the cracks.

trauma will bruise these pages
forever
the ink of discontent
will never run out
and I think about
today
how I woke up with anxiety
how I took a shower
and my shoulder hurts
and my ribs won’t stop rearranging themselves
and the pain is always better
but it never goes away forever
so yes
I am preoccupied with yesterday
simply because
the healing is never complete
and I don’t ever know
when the devil will come back to feast
on the frayed rope
holding my heart in one piece
and how can you heal
ever
when the struggle is never
complete
when I still see those glowing eyes
watching my every move
from a closet that never stays closed
I can’t let my guard down
ever
I can’t move on
because it never stops
following me
like a shadow
I cannot sever
from my ankles
so it drags behind me
everywhere I go.


–His malignant motivation mistaked my shudders as permission